“LIAR, LIAR, PANT’S ON FIRE”

Or, Ten Election Year “Rules”

1. If a politician’s policy or campaign promise can be explained in a sound bite, it is deliberately misleading.

2. What a politician says about himself is a deliberate exaggeration.

3. What a politician says about his opponent is a deliberate slander.

4. The only thing consistently true about a campaign ad is that it is a lie.

5. The number and pervasiveness of campaign ads are directly proportional to how corrupt the sponsors of the ad are.

6. All campaign contributions in excess of $100 are a blatant attempt by the donors to corrupt.

7. Politicians who accept contributions from anyone in excess of $100 are corrupt.

8. The politicians who collect the most campaign contributions are the most corrupt.

9. Bills passed during an election year by the party in power are for the sole purpose of encouraging more campaign contribution corruption and the titles of bills passed will be carefully chosen to misrepresent the actual effect of the law being proposed.

10. Voters will once again prove ignorant of all the foregoing rules.