Or, We Can’t Call Him President if the Constitution Doesn’t Apply to Him

Since Mr. Bush has openly declared the Constitution does not apply to him, it seems........inappropriate to continue referring to him by the Constitutional title of "President." I’m wondering what he’d prefer instead.

"King George" has a certain historical authenticity, but these days, I suppose kings are far too wimpy for a Supreme Commander-in-Chief moniker.

Those too have historical derivatives thanks to Julius’ own termination of a Republic. Besides, we already have the precedent of Energy Czars, Drug Czars, Czar-Czars. Of course, we know how touchy Bush is about things European. And, let us not forget Caesar’s a salad.

Maybe "Warlord" is divinely right given it includes the word "Lord" who Bush says is in direct communication with him. .........Nah, probably not. Too crudely Medieval sounding, accurate though it may be with his calling for “Crusades” again.

"El Jefe" would fit in well with Bush’s fondness for the short, dismissive nicknames he gives to others. Plus, his Spanish couldn’t be much worse than his tortured English.

Finally, the perfect name suddenly occurred to me. Surely he would be delighted with "Generalisimo." He would not only get to strut like the other Banana Belt dictators, he could finally justify wearing those fake military uniform he cherishes so much. And, with global warming, we’ll soon be in the Banana Belt anyway

Generalisimo Bush. We salute you.

No comments: