Or, 99 Reasons To Be Embarrassed You Ever Voted Republican in the 21st Century
1. You are fiscally conservative and believe governments should not spend more than you earn. The conversion of a national budget surplus into a doubled budget deficit appalls you.
2. You have read the Bible, especially the parts where it talks about what Jesus actually did such as throwing the money lenders out of the temple.
3. You have read the Bill of Rights and believe the words might have some importance for fairness and justice such as the parts that forbid warrantless searches and you wonder why the President admits spying on Americans without warrants and says he plans to continue doing so.
4. You believe the Bill of Rights should be enforced as written, not as someone else wished it was written.
5. You believe that our system of checks and balances between the branches of government has worked well and should not be abandoned despite being at war, especially an undeclared one.
6. You are appalled at the lack of oversight.
7. You have read the entire Constitution and noted that only Congress has the power to declare War. You are astounded that the last President to actually have the guts to ask Congress to declare a genuine War was Roosevelt.
8. You believe that diplomacy should be attempted before military force, especially when the military option costs billions a day.
9. You believe there should be plans for the peace as well as the war.
10. You do not believe you should be paying civil mercenaries $150,000 to do the same job privates in the military are doing for $20,000, especially when military families sometimes have to go on welfare.
11. You believe privates in the military ought to have effective armor vest and other basic necessities if they are heading into combat.
12. You believe members of the armed forces should not be forced to waste time being used as backdrops for politicians giving to political speeches.
13. You believe that the National Guard has a job to do in the states.
14. You believe there should be at least enough people in the military to get all its jobs done. For example, there is no excuse to not have guarded Iraqi arms depots so that the explosives could not be stolen for use later for explosives.
15. You believe there should be an accounting for the missing billions of nation building funds in Iraqi.
16. Your fiscal conservatism is appalled by the concept of no bid contracts granted to Halliburton and others, especially given the Vice President’s probable conflict of interest.
17. You believe that contracts with soldiers such as their periods of enlistment ought to be honored rather than ignored.
18. You believe in a return to the long established and highly useful tradition that those in command in the military ought to be reprimanded as well as any of their troops, especially when the troops in question seem to be following the spirit of what they were ordered as was the case with the torturing of prisoners by techniques that would not be allowed in US jails.
19. You believe that those in command when a military unit goes rogue and deliberately kills innocent civilians ought to be fired as well as the actual perpetrators.
20. You believe that simply changing the definition of torture is not sufficient to claim there is no torture being conducted.
21. You believe stupid mistakes or faulty intelligence data that get us into war are one thing. Deliberate misrepresentations and deceit are another.
22. You believe that those who claim they support the current Wars ought not to be hypocrites. You believe they ought to be willing to have their own sons and daughters in the military and be willing to help pay for it.
23. You find it ludicrous to hear the President insist he will stay in Iraq “as long as anyone wants to do us harm” which means effectively we will be there forever.
24. You owned stock in 2000 and wish it was still worth something.
25. You earn a wage for a living and would like to continue earning it rather than seeing your job taken by someone in India or China.
26. You can add 2 + 2 getting the same number three times running and wish the politicians, accountants and CEOs could too.
27. You are appalled to discover that some of the CEOs of companies have each managed to steal more money than all the armed robbers and welfare cheats in the entire history of this country put together.
28. You find it embarrassing that CEO salaries are thousands of times larger than the employees even when the CEO is caught running the company into the ground.
29. You don’t believe any CEO deserves to be paid over $100,000 per day.
30. You got at least a C in history, social studies, math, geography, geology and biology and wish that was a prerequisite for office seekers.
31. You recall from history that a “patriot” was someone who rebelled against King George, not someone who automatically supported his government, right or wrong.
32. You recall that they put the words “Don’t Tread on Me” on the flag, not in a constitutional amendment. You believe that Freedom of Speech means freedom for others to speak things you do not like.
33. You don’t understand why resources would be diverted from the hunt for Osama into conquering Iraq without finding Osama first.
34. You don’t understand why if it was necessary to invade Axis of Evil countries that the ones which admitted having nuclear weapons weren’t invaded first.
35. You are embarrassed that a secular country like Iraq is being converted into a fundamentalist Shitte country which will almost certainly tilt toward Iran.
36. You don’t understand why the ports and cargo containers are still not protected and inspected against terrorist tactics this long after 9/11.
37. You have to buy prescription medicine or cannot get health insurance.
38. You pay utility bills and still drive a gas powered engine. You wouldn’t mind paying $3.00 a gallon for gas if the increase in price was going to develop alternative sources of energy rather than being diverted to oil producing countries that hate us.
39. You think it borders on foolhardiness to insist we continue burning petroleum when it is obviously a finite resources leaving us at the mercy of those with oil.
40. You want accredited scientists making determinations on scientific merit rather than letting political appointees make determinations on whim or ideology. The attack on science and refusal to use science data unless it conforms ideological assumptions strikes you as stupid.
41. The refusal to even allow condoms or other forms of birth control for those who want to prevent unwanted pregnancies strikes you as a good argument for abortion of politicians after they get into office.
42. You honor your written word and believe others should too, including treaties we have signed. You don’t understand how we can expect others to honor commitments if we don’t show a good example.
43. You don't like bullies and hate torturers. You believe they belong in jail cells instead running the jails.
44. You would like to be able to trust the food you eat, the liquids you drink and the air you breathe. The idea of having inspectors and regulations to protect them was and is comforting.
45. You believe that the passenger rail system deserved to be saved particularly in a time of skyrocketing gas prices.
46. You believe laws should be obeyed and the regulators entrusted to enforce such laws should be well staffed, well financed, well trained and politically neutral.
47. You do not believe the words consensus, cooperation, compromise, conciliation and common sense should be curse words.
48. You believe that the impeachment standards applied to Clinton ought to apply to all Presidents, not just those of the other party.
49. You believe that there should be punishment for breaking the law regardless of how much you wish the law would be broken.
50. You understand that Freedom of Religion also means Freedom from Religion.
51. You are appalled that Osama Bin Laden is still at large years later even though the Taliban offered to surrender him for trial if the US would merely provide the minimal probably cause which a US court would insist upon anyway.
52. You have noticed the devaluation of the Medals of Freedom by being awarded to CIA Director George Tenet, Iraqi administrator Paul Bremer III, and Army General Tommy R. Franks for their intelligence (or lack thereof) regarding Iraq’s “WMDs” and the bungling of the War.
53. You were puzzled by the dismissals from government of Richard Clarke who got it right on terrorism, Larry Lindsey who got it right on the monetary cost of the Iraq War, General Eric Shinseki who got it right on the number of troops really needed, Colonel Charles Pritchard who got it right on North Korea’s nuclear intent, and Paul O’Neill who got it right on the tax cuts costs.
54. Unapologetic cronyism disgusts you. It is one thing to give party hacks jobs that do not mean anything, but keep them out of agencies that have important work to do or require special training or expertise.
55. You watched the tv coverage of Hurricane Katrina and all the preventable damage and destruction.
56. You learned despite the lack of qualifications of “Brownie” he was still appointed as head of FEMA.
57. You believe the legal community ought to be listened to regarding whether a judge has demonstrated competence and fairness.
58. You believe the best qualified and most neutral judges should be selected, preferably the ones that will appeal to the broadest spectrum of Americans to encourage obedience to the law and stability, rather than chaos.
59. You are angered why the titles of so many laws being passed such as the so-called Patriot Act, the so-called Clear Skies Initiative, the so-called Bankruptcy Reform Act, the so-called Healthy Forest Initiative, and the so-called Debt Reduction Act all seem to the opposite of the actual intent of the laws.
60. Your sense of fairness is offended by tax cuts which only go to the super rich and bankruptcy law changes which only adversely affect the lower classes and not the rich or their companies.
61. Your sense of fairness is offended by those driving a company into bankruptcy to take away pension plans and promises to the employees. You believe pensions and savings that someone has worked for all their lives is sacrosanct.
62. A $120,000,000 bridge to an Alaskan island with less than 100 people and the refusal of the senator to divert it to help hurricane victims speaks for itself especially when it would have been cheaper to just give the residents of the island a $100,000 each so they could each have their own yacht.
63. You are embarrassed that out opposition to the elimination of land mines putting the US solely in the company of dictators.
64. You may wish President Chavez was assassinated, but you don’t like hypocrites an example being Pat Robertson, a church leader and self proclaimed religious man, who called for assassinations of those he disagrees with like President Chavez.
65. You don’t like fat hypocrites like Limbaugh, an admitted drug addict, and Bennett, a compulsive gambler, holding themselves out as virtuous moral examples.
66. You don’t like liars like the so-called Swift Boat Veteran’s for the Truth and their Ads.
68. Halliburton, Rayethon, General Dynamics and no bid contracts.
69. A 50 foot wall to be constructed at $1.3 million per mile on a tiny portion of the Mexican border, especially when there was not even any funding for it.
70. The proposed silly $100 tax rebate for gas prices.
71. Bankruptcy of pension funds.
72. The cutting of funds from the Mining Safety agency every year and the deaths that follow, especially given the cost/benefit analysis showing that it would be cheaper to prevent disasters than to try and clean them up.
73. You are worried about Afghanistan now growing more heroin poppies than when the Taliban were in charge.
74. You are worried about the national leader of Afghanistan seems to be really only the mayor of the capitol city given how little he controls.
75. You are worried that all the effort in Afghanistan and all the deaths and all the money may have been for nothing.
76. Granting a White House press pass to a gay stripper solely because he asked soft questions strikes you as deeply offensive.
77. Special prosecutor Ken Starr and his monument to incompetency is still bothering you.
78. You believe that Speakers of the House should not make medical diagnosis from videotapes even if they are doctors.
79. You believe that if the Republican party is for States Rights, then it ought to apply even if you don’t like what some other state is doing like Oregon’s Right to Die with Dignity law.
80. You are offended that the leadership thinks you are too stupid to understand the games being played with words like changing “estate tax” to “death tax” especially when the only ones being taxed these days are those with monstrous estates.
81. You believe that the loyal opposition has a right to oppose and not be called traitors, especially since you have often been the loyal opposition.
82. You believe that anyone should be able to attend public meetings paid for or defended out of taxpayer funds and not denied entry merely because they disagree with the speaker.
83. You realize the pendulum always swings the other way at some point and wish those in power weren’t so intent on making mortal enemies. You are worried the other side might decide to adopt the same dirty tricks to get into and stay in office.
84. Mark Foley and the Republican controlled Congressional “Ethics” Committees.
85. Republican owned Diebold Corporation which supplies voting machines which can cheat especially since Republicans might not always own or control such machines.
86. The President’s opposition to the 9/11 Commission and his refusal to adopt most of its proposed safeguards scares you.
87. The President’s opposition to the Baker Commission and his refusal to adopt most of its proposed safeguards scares you.
88. The continuation of pork barrel earmarks.
89. The do-nothing Congress.
90. The trade deficit.
91. The budget deficit.
93. The alienation of our allies.
94. Arrogance, petulance and childishness.
95. Cowardice whether to the enemy or the press corp.
96. Boorishness, talking with your mouth full on camera at a summit meeting, lack of manners and fondling on camera the female leader of another country who obviously did not want to be fondled.
97. Inflexibility, inability to change course when needed and unwillingness to listen to advice. Getting it wrong and endangering us or costing us is one thing. Refusing to consider other approaches once you know it is wrong is something else.
98. It is one thing to lie to enemies. It is another thing to lie to us.
99. Doing so much so wrong for so long makes even Hillary Clinton looks like a viable candidate in comparison.